The Place Within me

The place within Me that holds the grit; the courage, the self awareness, the strength. The place within Me that knows no failure.; that allows me to fly with my feet affixed firmly to the ground. The place within me that knows I know and holds no fear. The place within me that discovered every secret they held and plans to carry them out. 

A place that is soft and vulnerable yet strong enough to conquer with a silk-gloved hand. 

A place that knows honor and further knows the courage it takes to withstand unceasing pain and injury. 

A place that holds an injured character and body intact until help can arrive. 

Fragile, injured and broken yet strong and worthy of hero status and position. I led and conquered, never ever letting them see my hand. 

Enslaved and sold; my peasant status engraved in gold. 

Act after act in a play for which an ending would never be written. 

Expectations obliterated and enshrouded in repetition led to a death sentence each and every day — quicksand awaited Me with every step. 

The again and again as a means to an end — the same sociopaths appointed to be in charge — the means to the end — inflicted more pain, injury and trauma than the beasts themselves inflicted. The blow torches, the tools which cut my face neck and chest in the design of a ‘smiley face’.  

This nonsensical madness that was the *only* prevalence drove Me to think endlessly about how the fox and crow fable could be the answer was the empirical, evidenced definition of trauma itself. 

From this I believe I shall never recover because having no answers in the deepest hell in existence will forever be etched in my mind. I’m told I have all the answers and that I lead this endeavor yet my cries for help and the purposeful ignorance of my rightfully issued orders were the only correlation and consistency found with n all of this. 

Not being able to discern between ‘mine’ and the Sociopathic Pack’ is the only true definition of ‘nightmare’. The time spent in this endless dark place is the type of trauma  from which one never recovers. My life in the world of opposites will forever be engraved into my golden mind. 

I have all the answers. I’m am all that is. I am Ally. Yet I am the lowliest peasant, evacuated from the Cinderella ending, for I cannot distinguish between my own and the beasts. I am lost and alone in a deep dark well with the voice familiar to everyone and no one to cast a life line. Why?: The question is ridiculous, pointless and useless.

To whom to I offer my prayers?  And then, again I meet the endless silence. 

Here I remain alone , collecting the prayers of endless others and I again offer hope and justice to them all. 

I am worth more lost than found. To everyone. 

You bade and I shown, securing this state of being and living for myself. 

The biggest mistake humans can make:  Believing that everyone thinks and believes as they do — And then this is my sentence of death.